Calm is the New Busy

For decades, the default response to, “how are you doing?”—especially for women in the nonprofit sector in the United States—has been a single word: busy.

Busy has become a badge of honor—a shorthand for productivity, commitment, and worthiness. It signals that we are doing enough, giving enough, that we are enough. But underneath that badge lies a heavy weight: exhaustion, resentment, and sometimes even despair. Women, in particular, have long been expected to sacrifice ourselves—freely offering our unpaid or underpaid labor to make life easier for others, no matter the toll on our physical, emotional, and spiritual health.

But what if we flipped the script?

Imagine if the standard response to, “how are you doing?” was instead: calm.

Pause and notice how that feels in your body. Does your chest open up? Does your breath deepen? Do your shoulders drop, even slightly? What if we made calm—rather than chaos—the truth of our daily lives?

Frazzled and burned out have never been sustainable ways of working or living. They don’t support our best thinking, our creativity, our happiness, or our ability to make an impact. Instead, they lead to stress-related health problems, distraction, turnover, mistakes, and disconnection. A constant state of busyness is not a measure of success; it’s a red flag.

What if, instead of glorifying the grind, our aim was to feel at peace?

Calm doesn’t mean disengaged. It doesn’t mean apathetic. Calm is clarity. Calm is focus. Calm is being rooted enough to respond instead of react, to create instead of scramble, to connect instead of collapse.

A calm orientation could transform the way we:

• Show up for ourselves. We would make space for rest, reflection, and joy—not as luxuries, but as essentials.

• Manage our time. Instead of filling every minute with tasks, we could align our energy with our true priorities.

• Engage in our work. We could approach challenges with steady confidence, innovation, and care.

• Relate to others. Calm creates room for compassion, patience, and deeper listening.

• Shape society. Imagine a culture where flourishing—not frantic busyness—was the marker of contribution and success.

The nonprofit sector, in particular, is ready for this shift. For too long, we’ve operated in survival mode, internalizing the belief that urgency and overwork are signs of dedication. But the mission-driven work we care about deserves more than our depletion; it deserves our wholeness.

Calm is not indulgent. Calm is powerful. Calm is generative.

What would be possible for you, for your organization, for our communities, if calm—not busy—was the new default?