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As a woman who works in the nonprofit sector
You care deeply about what you do
And you’re nurturing change in real, tangible ways
But the way we’ve been taught to do this work
Feels misaligned, even wrong
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* "Nonprofit sector" is commonly used in the US and includes charitable, community, non-governmental (NGO), civil society, philanthropic, and voluntary organizations
We've been working toward a world
free from oppression
where everyone can flourish
But community work is shaped by the very systems we are resisting
What would it look like if our work
Mirrored the future we’re working toward
Instead of leaving us feeling like we sold our souls?
Imagine...You wake up clear and focused. Thinking about the day ahead you feel purposeful and deeply alive. Your ideas are flowing. There is space to think, create, and connect with your community. Your work has rhythm.
When people ask, “how are you?” you respond “absolutely amazing” or “wonderful” because you love your job. Your days are grounded in sustainable practices and your time, energy, and capacity are protected. You take breaks when you need them and do something that nourishes you every day.
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Your work is meaningful, but not your entire identity. You belong to yourself first. You have adequate space and resources for a vibrant, full life beyond it.
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Donors and volunteers are true partners in the work. They understand the depth and complexity of creating change and work alongside you with patience and trust. Their generous, unconditional support expands what’s possible rather than constraining it.
This may feel far from reality right now. It’s OK if it does.
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It means you care and know we can do better.
You’re surrounded by people who show up with care, ready to contribute to something powerful and beautiful in community with others. Your coworkers collaborate generously and communicate openly. There is trust, honesty, and a shared commitment to the work and to one another.
There is a sense of belonging that runs through everything. You are able to show up fully as a thinker, creator, leader, and human. You openly share your hopes, dreams, and doubts which are met with love and tenderness by others who gently hold space. Your contributions are recognized, your perspective is valued, your lived experience is respected, and your presence matters.
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The work is challenging, but you navigate it with care and ease. You have space and support to move with intention. You have the capacity to be visionary and connected to the bigger picture.
Joy is centered in your work culture. Power is shared. Collaboration is the norm. People focus on what matters most.
Your work has a visible, meaningful impact. Flourishing communities begin to take root. Barriers are dismantled. Systems shift. Change is something you witness, participate in, and help cultivate every day. A more equitable, humane, and life-affirming world is not just aspirational, but tangible.
This is what most people think it’s like to work for a nonprofit.
And it’s what you thought when you were starting out
in this work.
But now you know the truth.
You’ve worked in the nonprofit sector for more than a decade and now you’re somewhat burned out, disillusioned, and quietly yearning for a deeper, more soulful way to lead and to live.
You aren’t too emotional or sensitive.
Your depth is your wisdom. It's what this work deserves.
Feeling this way isn't a personal failure. It's the result of patterned conditions designed to rely on your endless giving.
It’s not your fault.
The nonprofit sector is enmeshed within a web of systems that shape what’s possible, who is trusted, and how resources flow. This distorts priorities and places disproportionate pressure on women, especially women of color.
We have been taught to believe that:​​
It’s selfish to put ourselves first and it's virtuous to put our needs and desires aside for the common good
The harder we work, the more we’ll get done
It’s normal to feel stressed and burned out when doing this work
We shouldn’t have what we want if others don’t have what they need
System change precedes individual change, leaving us powerless to collaboratively progress
The nonprofit industrial complex prioritizes urgency, individualism, competition, and short-term gains. We’re pressured to do more with less, stretch beyond capacity, and demonstrate our value in ways that don’t reflect the depth of the work.
You’re treated like a machine that is expected to produce outputs. Overwork is an expectation and exhaustion is reframed as dedication.
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You are not a machine.
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You're a human being with unique desires, ideas, talents, and capabilities.
We are navigating systems designed to extract from us,
yet our struggles are framed as personal failure.
Nonprofits started from a place of generosity but are now rooted in scarcity. There is never enough time, money, donors, volunteers, qualified staff, and other resources.
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Community organizations are expected to assume the role of pauper and beggar while foundations hold more than $1.86 trillion in the United States alone–a 78% increase from 2020 to 2026 (Federal Reserve Economic Data).
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We preach systemic injustice but promise to deliver self-sufficiency. Our work is steered by people removed from people’s daily realities. Proximity to wealth and normativity shape whose voices are heard and elevated.
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Our communities are treated like consumers that should be grateful to receive whatever nonprofits and their funders decide is best for them.
Unpaid internships and low wages create barriers to entry and advancement. The sector often relies on people who can afford to stay rather than those with the deepest lived experience or connection to the community.
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Compensation in the nonprofit sector reflects the priorities of our society and culture, and the patterns are clear. Women make up nearly 75% of the workforce and about half are people of color (Independent Sector, Candid) with much of the work involving communities that have been marginalized.
Women are expected to offer more time, care, emotional labor, and flexibility without corresponding compensation. Self-sacrifice is normalized and even celebrated. Women of color face additional layers of scrutiny, under-recognition, and exclusion.
Caring too much is not consent.
Without intentional change, the way we work will continue to replicate the very systems we are trying to transform.
And so, instead of doing fulfilling, purposeful work and creating real change, we spend our days trying to stay awake through boring meetings, protecting and defending ourselves to protect fragile egos, selling a tainted picture of reality to funders, putting out fires, scraping by on leftovers, and daydreaming about the vacation that you can never find the time to take.
Work begins to feel like something to endure, not something to enjoy.
You wake up in the middle of the night worried about the tone of the email you got from a board member, running numbers, and anticipating challenges. You find yourself pouring hours into a $5,000 restricted grant, tracking receipts, writing reports, navigating absurd requirements, and wondering how something so insignificant can demand so much of your energy.
You keep working harder and more strategically, but the problems and expectations just keep getting bigger and bigger.
You’re already doing the work of multiple people, and it still doesn’t feel like enough.
Rest is endlessly deferred, scheduled for a future that never arrives. Even when you step away, part of you is still bracing for what’s waiting when you return.
You've tried to be more resilient, practice self-care, manage your time better, and think positive thoughts. But none of it works.​
​Tension and exhaustion are settling in your body as you carry the weight of uncertainty and unfair expectations. You sometimes feel disconnected, numb, exhausted, frustrated, drained, burned out, and fed up.
When you started on this path you were full of energy and thought that you could change the world. Now you sometimes wonder if you should just quit and get a job at a warehouse or the grocery store. You never thought it would be this hard.
And after all you’ve given, you’re feeling more and more undervalued, even invisible, as you get older.
You feel the pain of the world and are doing everything you can to help it heal, yet you are struggling to thrive yourself. You’re functioning but not flourishing.
This isn’t failure. It’s a signal that you deserve better.
You care passionately about social justice, equity, and liberation, yet feel trapped in systems that reward extraction and self-erasure.
You’ve been making it work by filling in the gaps with your unpaid labor and energy as your kindness and compassion are exploited.
There isn’t anything wrong with you;
it’s the conditions we’re working in.​
And now you’re on the threshold of creating a change…
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You don’t want to tolerate the BS and hypocrisy anymore.
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Toxic positivity makes you sick, but you’re also sick of getting lost in spirals of critique that change nothing and leave you feeling angry, hopeless, and exhausted.
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You’re no longer willing to sacrifice your health, relationships, or self-worth for work that claims to be about justice, care, and liberation.
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You’re ready to stop abandoning yourself, your values, and your dreams.
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You want to spend the rest of your career effectively addressing systemic issues and interrupting oppression without feeling overwhelmed and disillusioned.
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You want liberation to be a tangible feeling and condition you can experience, not just an aspiration.
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And you’re over changing yourself to fit into structures that were never designed for you to thrive.
Venting after work over drinks isn’t helping anymore. You don’t just want to cope, you want to feel at fully at home in your work and life again. You want your work to feel simpler. You want to feel calm and focused, but also energized and alive. You want to make a meaningful contribution to a better world.
You want to change the system but you’re pulled in a million directions every day, balancing the urgency of community needs, tight budgets, donor demands, and political drama. Thinking about it add yet another layer of overwhelm.
We are never going to create real change
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As long as we are depleted, exhausted, and entangled with systems of domination
​I’m Jessica Aviva and I’m here to accompany you on this journey as we learn new ways to create change.
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For more than 25 years, doing community work has been my passion. But it has been deeply disappointing and, at times, traumatic.
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In my early 20s, I got my first full time job in nonprofit sector. I was so excited to do meaningful work.
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Within a few weeks, I locked myself in a bathroom and was crying after being bullied by a coworker trying to prove her worth (as if the stress of the job wasn’t enough).
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When I was in my 30s, I was at a donor reception catching up with “friends” who would later drop me after I left my overly stressful executive director job. Suddenly the room started spinning. I felt nauseous and dizzy.
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I left the event early, without saying goodbye to anyone, blasted Patti Smith in my car, and drove to the park to reconnect with the earth.
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I looked successful on the outside, but I felt like I had failed myself.
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In my 40s, I developed an eye twitch for several months under the reign of a supervisor who lied to me and expected me to do the same, belittled me, and accused me of things that I didn’t do. A few years later, after a conversation with an executive director client, I found myself curled up in the fetal position and wondering if I wanted to continue in this work.
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​​Whatever happened to that idealistic little girl who was going to change the world?
You are not alone.
And you weren’t meant to do this alone.
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​​​Earning five degrees, attending conferences around the country, and extensive reading did not prepare me for any of this.
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Eventually I realized that being underpaid, working 80+ hours a week, and feeling exhausted all the time was unintentionally recreating the inequities that I was working to dismantle.
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My lived experience has taught me what theory alone cannot: systems do not change when the people inside them are depleted.
You have the skills, expertise, and relationships to make nonprofits more equitable, but need the right framework and support to turn your vision into action and results.
You’re ready to feel free and flourishing instead of constrained and exhausted.
You’re ready to come back home to yourself.
And you’re ready to grow your legacy into the full depth of what is possible.
You're ready to cross this threshold, but you need structure and support.
Nobody can do this alone, including me. And we shouldn’t have to.
I want you to flourish and feel free to be your whole self, full of desire and vibrancy.
To honor your needs as well as what your community deserves.
It’s what you've been dreaming about and working toward.
That’s why I designed the Free and Flourishing Framework , a living ecosystem of regenerative practices lovingly tended in a community of care.
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​​Translate complex justice frameworks into daily practice with integrity
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Recognize how small, everyday choices disrupt toxic systems and create cultural shifts
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Embody the community and systemic change you are working toward right now
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Stop deferring your needs and dreams
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Lead in alignment with your values, not in reaction to broken systems
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Prioritize joy, rest, play, and pleasure without shame or guilt
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Consistently feel focused and energized
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Set clear boundaries, say no, and ask for help
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Feel seen, supported, and understood
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Ground your work in generosity rather than scarcity
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Find a sustainable rhythm and flow
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Expand your impact without burning out
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Disrupt and rebuild the nonprofit sector
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Facilitate human and ecological healing and flourishing​
The Free and Flourishing Framework creates space for you to:
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​The Free and Flourishing Framework frees us from the constraints of systemic injustice
So that we can collectively flourish
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You don’t need to work harder. You don’t need to be someone else.
You need systems and methods that nourish and sustain you.
We waste our lives waiting for the day when there’s finally time to rest, when the grant is submitted, when the crisis passes, and when the change we’re working toward finally arrives. But that day isn’t going to come, because there will always be something that seems urgent vying for our attention. Life and its challenges will always be there.
We need to stop postponing our wellbeing, our very lives. Instead of waiting for better conditions, we can live differently within the ones we have.
We don’t create the world we know is possible by deferring our desires. We create it by embodying them here and now.
Welcome to The Garden Party for a Flourishing World , a calm, gentle space where we practice the Free and Flourishing Framework with playfulness and vulnerability while fully showing up and truly seeing each other.
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This healing-centered space is for women who want to:
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Make nonprofit work easy and fun while making a real difference
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Feel courageously optimistic while remaining grounded in reality without relying on individualistic self-help methods, new age magic, gurus to follow, shallow pep talks, decontextualized advice, toxic positivity, or classes in time management, confidence for women, and resilience
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Rehumanize the nonprofit sector, grounded in generosity and love
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Expand into the care and clarity you know the world needs alongside others who are no longer willing to shrink to survive nonprofits, while witnessing, supporting, and flourishing together
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Make systemic change less abstract and overwhelming, and more doable and tangible
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If you’re looking for quick fixes, rigid formulas, or someone to tell you exactly what to do, this isn’t the space for you. You want tools to employ and personalized support, not directives to follow.
You don’t need yet another training.
You don’t need to just be more productive or manage your time better.
You need a place where your desires are welcome and nourished
And your care is protected, not exploited
So you can cultivate flourishing instead of depletion.
When you’re stressed, instead of wasting time social scrolling, trying to figure things out on
your own, and anticipating challenges, you can stroll through The Garden Party for respite, restoration, and inspiration. The Garden Party isn't a space for passive consumption, it's an opportunity to imagine, create, and flourish in community.
The Garden Party isn’t therapy or counseling.
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It’s not another space where you are analyzed or optimized.
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It’s about creating and experiencing the conditions where you can be resourced, supported, and sustained so that you can be more fully yourself.
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It’s a place to tend your capacity so you can lead with more ease, clarity, and impact.
The Garden Party is a 24/7 space where you get to:
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Learn simple, fun, easy actions to protect your energy and wellbeing, focus on what matters most, and cultivate conditions for flourishing that don’t require you to meditate for 15 minutes on demand every morning or participate in a 3-hour retreat
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Connect with an ecosystem of women having similar experiences
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Be fully seen as you share your real, unfiltered challenges
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Tend your capacity gently, collectively, and sustainably
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Ground everything you learn in the day-to-day realities of your life and work
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Cultivate the conditions for flourishing within yourself, our movements, and the wider world
Over time, you may notice that…
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Your generosity is no longer subsidizing others’ underfunding
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Rest is no longer a reward
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Boundaries don’t feel like betrayal
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You feel more like yourself again
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You stop volunteering your evenings by default
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You feel less irritable and resentful
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You’re energized and excited to softly move through challenges
You don’t have to toughen up or push harder.
The system needs to soften and slow down.
And together, we can practice embodying that transformation in real time.
The world needs you to be more of yourself,
not exhausted into compliance.
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You are enough, just as you are.
And by reclaiming yourself and protecting your energy, you’ll feel more at peace.
Not because the world magically changed, but because you are no longer abandoning yourself within it.
By embodying that peace, you’ll naturally radiate more love into the spaces around you.
And it spreads slowly, one tiny seed at a time.
That vision you had for what nonprofit work could be begins to feel possible again because you are living into it every day in community with others.
And you’ll be able to imagine more creative solutions to the complex problems we face. Just as importantly, you’ll actually have the capacity to enact those solutions. Instead of reacting from scarcity and urgency, you’ll lead from possibility, moving our work and movements forward in powerful new ways.​
You don’t need to fix yourself, work more, or sacrifice more.
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It’s time to reclaim yourself and heal in community
so that you can create real change.
This is your invitation to get nourished so that your work, and thereby the world, can flourish.
Come to the party
Bring your whole, messy, beautiful self and together we will create the world we dream is possible.
